I have
a dream: that one-day people around the world will stop for a while and take
the time to look inside with the sincere determination to really know their true
self. With practice, most would realize that due to their own lack of self-awareness
and inner knowledge they are probably making themselves (somewhat) unhappy, and
consequently also the ones around them. At least, that’s what happened (and
keeps happening) to me every time I take the time to meet myself and just be.
In
an era in which most of us only give importance to outwardly matters and
external appearances (physical look, material goods, status) having inner time
is crucial to our personal and social well-being.
Breath - the invisible key
How
to look inside, how to go within? By meditating – and it is an extremely straightforward
technique, not a mystic rite that needs a special initiation.
It
is merely stopping in a calm environment, seating with the back straight,
closing the eyes and observing the breath: coming in, going out. Easy, right?
Breath
is the gift we received when we were born, before the moment of our birth we
did not need to do it. And breath is the invisible key to go inside and start
the amazing journey of inner self-discovery. It is neither a short nor a calm
trip – but an extremely rewarding one, every step of the way.
Shower your mind
During
(almost) every moment of our existence we use our mind non-stop, all the time,
without ever thinking that it needs a break (sleep does not count, many of us
have vivid dreams) and without considering that it could use a deep cleaning. Meditation
is just that: a good shower – where you let the water flow without minding to
catch it, where you are present with yourself, relax, put your defenses down,
and softly wash every little piece of your body, even the dirtier parts. When
you come out of it you feel refreshed, purer, more you. Without its regular
shower, the mind becomes dirty and stops seeing our reality with clarity.
Having
been meditating daily for more than a year I can prove its benefits – I feel
lighter, brighter, more connected to myself and also to others. Most
importantly, I stopped a lot of my chronic harmful behaviors towards myself and
others (biting my nails, over eating, snapping at someone, etc.) and started
living a life much truer to myself.
How to do it? The process
1.
Stop
procrastinating: just do it!
I
started by having only 15 minutes of inner
peace time – it was all that I could afford to give myself at that time,
having so many pending and urgent issues to deal with. Inevitable before seating
I would procrastinate: arrange the room (as if I could see it! I was about to
close my eyes…), drink water, go to the restroom…Then I would muster the
necessary resolve and say to myself: “just do it!”.
2.
Stillness
can seem like torture, but only in the beginning…
At
first, it was so challenging! It felt like an eternity! 15 minutes doing: “nothing”?
That was a novelty for me, known active multitasker. After a couple of minutes,
my lower back would hurt – even if I was seating on top of a comfortable pillow
– my legs became numb, and my mind wouldn’t stop, it behaved like a monkey
going from branch to branch, only that it was moving fast from thought to
thought.
I
knew I should not be tempted to follow the monkey, or even to dwell in a specific
branch, but sometimes when I realized I was already lost in my own jungle of
thoughts. My task was merely to observe, like someone going to the movies. I
just had to look at the screen, follow the story as it unfolded in front of me.
As simple as that. Of course, (too) many times, I found myself entering into
the screen and becoming a movie character – and felt so excited about that that
I did not want to come back to my spectator seat. It felt boring.
3.
Be
your own spectator
However,
after some time practicing I realized that when I stayed in my own movie and
went with its flow I felt exhausted by the time the meditation session came to
an end. My mind was restless and my body tense – and worst: I hadn’t learnt
anything about myself. On another hand,
when I had the determination to remain on the spectator’s seat and watch my
movie, I felt calm, relaxed and was able to learn new things about my thought pattern.
What kind of thoughts came to my mind? Urgent “to do” lists, episodes of my
life I felt guilty about, the future, the past? It was like playing a game with
myself. Every day I was curious to discover what would emerge.
Gradually,
the sessions started to become longer: from 15 minutes, to 17, then 23, 29, 33,
40, 45, 50..until after 1 year it got to 1 hour and over. Miraculously my body
stopped hurting and I could hold the posture with ease. This made me realize
that humans are the only animal that needs support to hold its own body:
chairs, sofas, pillows, mattresses. All of that furniture is clearly
comfortable - don’t get me wrong - but our exclusive reliance on chairs to seat
has clearly weakened our body structure and sometimes even prompted some
postural ailments. As I seated for longer periods of time, I felt more
connected to my body, identified my weaknesses and also my strengths – and
started to understand the need of taking care of myself, gently and softly.
Meditation – what for?
Meditation
is an investment in oneself and an experiential training on how to develop real
love. How can we say we love others or expect love from them if we do not know
how to love ourselves?
